ENNEA-Typing Out (Extended Version)

by Jerome Wagner, Ph.D.

There is an amusingly ghoulish show on TV called “Wednesday.” Wednesday is the daughter in the, shall we say, non-traditional Addams family. She is attending her mother Morticia’s alma mater for similarly “gifted” children such as Medusas who turn people to stone when you look at their hair and werewolves who transform from ordinary humans into animal-like creatures when the moon is full.

The latter refer to themselves as “wolfing out” when the transformation occurs. If they don’t want to “wolf out,” they can put themselves in a holding pen until the moon goes away.

In my own macabre way, I think this is a striking metaphor for Enneagram types. You might recall times when you’ve “One’d out” or “Two’d out” or “Three’d out” etc. Times when you’ve transmuted into grotesque versions of yourself — like those medieval statuaries. Times when you’ve said “That was my evil twin” or “I was beside myself.” The change can happen quickly – especially when the moon is full and you’ve been left unsupervised.

While this is a frightening conversion, the good news is it’s only temporary –until the moon disappears. The moon is what triggers your defensive style — what brings out your teeth and claws. Who wants to mess with a werewolf? The moon can bring out the worst in us. We can also be moonstruck – out of our minds. A temporary insanity. “I don’t know what came over me.” I was suddenly so angry, so helpful, so preening, so misunderstood, so withdrawn, so afraid, so distracted, so aggressive, so exhausted. You get the idea.

What is your moon? What are you particularly sensitive about? What are you trying to avoid? What’s the worst thing that can happen to you that you’ll do anything to prevent it? Your unconscious radar is constantly scanning for threats to your ego. And it brings out the rapid-response team. When the danger is dealt with, the defenses can be lowered.

Are you afraid of being wrong and criticized? Unappreciated and rejected? Overlooked and unfeted? Misunderstood and abandoned? Not understanding and ridiculed? Caught off guard and injured? Restricted and bored? Weak and taken advantage of? Disturbed and made uncomfortable?

Defensively, you “One out” and try harder; “Two out” and help co-dependently; “Three out” and take on more projects; “Four out” and compare enviously; “Five out” and vanish into your cerebral castle; “Six out” and doubt, doubt, doubt; “Seven out” and plan pleasurable possibilities; “Eight out” and lash out; “Nine out” and pass out. Not to mention all the other techniques you’ve discovered to survive those real and imagined assaults on your ego ideal.

Again, unless you are permanently moonstruck, these states are transient and you can return to your essential self when the danger passes.

How can you avoid “Enneatyping out” in the first place? One way is to recognize your moon, put yourself in a safe holding pen when it appears, and stay out of the woods. That requires awareness – noticing the triggering stimuli (your vulnerabilities and sensitivities) and then short-circuiting or circumventing the automatic reaction. Stay in and ground yourself in your inner resources vs. storming out with your ego defenses. Reprogram your brain. Let that very stimuli prompt you to do something else. When you see that donut, pick up a carrot. Really, who are you kidding? When you envy someone, appreciate them instead of wanting to eliminate them.

Here’s an enneasummary:

Type 1: The Good Person

• The Core Trigger: Irresponsibility, laziness, or a violation of foundational ethical values.
• What makes them “One Out”: When they perceive glaring unfairness, slacking off, or a lack of personal accountability from others.
• The “Wolf” Reaction: They transform into a highly critical, rigid, and resentful crusader, aggressively pointing out errors and micromanaging rules.

Type 2: The Loving Person

• The Core Trigger: Personal rejection, feeling unappreciated, or others showing blatant selfishness.
• What makes them “Two Out”: When their generosity is taken for granted or they realize a relationship they poured energy into is entirely one-sided.
• The “Wolf” Reaction: They shift from warm and nurturing to manipulative, martyred, and overly intrusive, aggressively demanding appreciation or guilt-tripping others.

Type 3: The Effective Person

• The Core Trigger: Failure, public embarrassment, lack of recognition, or being forced to slow down.
• What makes them “Three Out”: Being accused of being “fake,” or having their efficiency compromised by other people’s incompetence.
• The “Wolf” Reaction: They become ruthlessly competitive, hyper-focused on image control, and dismissive of human emotion, treating people purely as obstacles or resources.

Type 4: The Original Person

• The Core Trigger: Being forced to conform, being dismissed as “ordinary,” or sensing a lack of authenticity.
• What makes them “Four Out”: Feeling entirely misunderstood or realizing that people are refusing to engage with them on a deep emotional level.
• The “Wolf” Reaction: They spiral into extreme emotional drama, dramatic withdrawal, and bitter sarcasm, magnifying their flaws or uniqueness to punish those who “don’t get them.”

Type 5: The Wise Person

• The Core Trigger: Boundary violations, forced emotional exposure, or demands on their limited time and energy.
• What makes them “Five Out”: Intrusive people asking for private information, hyper-emotional displays, or crowded, loud environments.
• The “Wolf” Reaction: They completely freeze out the world, retreating into extreme mental isolation, cynical hoarding of data, and arrogant intellectual superiority.

Type 6: The Loyal Person

• The Core Trigger: Betrayal, broken trust, unexpected chaos, or an existential threat to their safety.
• What makes them “Six Out”: People moving forward without a clear plan, or leaders giving them vague, untrustworthy directions.
• The “Wolf” Reaction: They succumb to intense paranoia and hyper-vigilance, aggressively attacking perceived threats, dividing people into “us vs. them,” and projecting worst-case scenarios onto everyone.

Type 7: The Joyful Person

• The Core Trigger: Feeling trapped, limited, or forced to look at painful, dark emotional realities.
• What makes them “Seven Out”: Rigid schedules, arbitrary rules, or people bringing down the mood with pessimistic, black-and-white thinking.
• The “Wolf” Reaction: They become frantically impulsive, demanding, scattered, and deeply self-indulgent, completely escaping reality through manic planning or toxic positivity.

Type 8: The Powerful Person

• The Core Trigger: Control tactics, vulnerability exposure, injustice, or deceit.
• What makes them “Eight Out”: Seeing the weak get bullied, or feeling like someone is trying to micro-manage, manipulate, or restrict their personal autonomy.
• The “Wolf” Reaction: They display explosive, unmitigated anger, becoming bulldozing and intimidatingly confrontational to completely dominate the room and protect their soft interior.

Type 9: The Peaceful Person

• The Core Trigger: Being overlooked, pushed into a corner, or forced into aggressive conflict.
• What makes them “Nine Out”: People blatantly ignoring their preferences, interrupting their pace, or assuming they will just passively go along with everything.
• The “Wolf” Reaction: While they usually suppress their energy, when they finally snap, they “wolf out” through fierce passive-aggression, stubborn non-compliance, or a sudden, shocking explosion of long-buried rage.

Another approach for dealing with “Enneatyping Out,” though not necessarily pleasant, is exposure therapy. Stick around in the very situation or condition you would really rather avoid. If Pavlov and Skinner were correct, your fear will gradually extinguish when you discover that imperfection, selfishness, incompetence, ordinariness, ignorance, recklessness, boredom, softness, anger, etc. don’t kill you or others. And you will eventually stop salivating when those dreaded imaginary consequences don’t appear. Just know that you will be quite anxious until the extinction works. And you will think this is really the dumbest advice you’ve ever been given.

You might also expose, let be seen, those parts of you that you have in common with the type on the other end of that arrow going away from you. You know, that type you don’t want to be seen as.

Exposure therapy for each Enneatype:

Type 1: The Good Person (Integrates to 7)

• The Step: Practice intentional imperfection and spontaneous play.
• How to do it: When the urge to criticize or fix everything peaks, step away. Allow things to be messy or incomplete. Purposely schedule unstructured time to laugh, create, or relax without a goal.
• Spend 5” thinking about what’s right.
• Do something shabbily and sloppily – play with it.
• Think of something you did wrong and stay with it until your anxiety decreases.

Type 2: The Loving Person (Integrates to 4)

• The Step: Practice radical self-honesty and clear boundaries.
• How to do it: Before jumping in to save or help someone, ask yourself: “What do I actually need right now?” Learn to sit with your own emotional landscape and express your needs directly, rather than hiding behind caretaking.
• Do some little thing for yourself each day.
• Remember a time when you asked for help and stay with it till the anxiety passes.
• Think of a time when you said “no” to someone and stay with it till the guilt and anxiety decrease.

Type 3: The Effective Person (Integrates to 6)

• The Step: Shift focus from performance to authentic belonging.
• How to do it: Slow down and invest in relationships where you are valued for who you are, not what you accomplish. Cooperate with a team without needing to lead it, and openly admit to your fears or failures.
• If no one knew what you were thinking, wanting, or doing, what would you think, want, and do then?
• Think of a time you looked bad and stay with it till your anxiety decreases.
• Remember when someone outshined you and stay with it till the competition calms down.

Type 4: The Original Person (Integrates to 1)

• The Step: Ground emotional intensity in objective action.
• How to do it: Translate your deep, swirling feelings into productive, daily routines. Stop waiting for the “perfect mood” to act. Focus on objective reality outside of yourself by helping others or working on a practical task.
• Mindfully do something ordinary each day without making it extraordinary.
• Think of a time when you were seen before you were ready to be seen and stay with it till the embarrassment passes.
• Remember a time when you were cheery and superficial and stay with it till your anxiety decreases.

Type 5: The Wise Person (Integrates to 8)

• The Step: Move from detached observation into physical action.
• How to do it: Step out of your head and into your body. Share your thoughts before they feel completely perfected. Speak up with conviction, assert your space in the physical world, and engage directly with the people around you.
• Make a list of your feelings at the end of each day. Tell someone what those feelings were.
• Think of a time when you looked foolish and stay with it till your anxiety decreases.
• Remember when you tried to negotiate and didn’t get what you wanted and stay with it till the embarrassment decreases.

Type 6: The Loyal Person (Integrates to 9)

• The Step: Cultivate internal quiet and trust.
• How to do it: Consciously quiet the worst-case scenario thoughts by breathing deeply and focusing on the present moment. Accept that life holds a baseline of peace. Trust your inner authority rather than constantly polling others for reassurance.
• Relax for 5” each day believing that the universe will keep you safe.
• Remember a time when you were betrayed and stay with it till the fear, anxiety, and anger decrease.
• Remember a time when you were in doubt but made a decision and acted anyway.

Type 7: The Joyful Person (Integrates to 5)

• The Step: Practice presence, silence, and emotional sobriety.
• How to do it: When a painful emotion or a boring moment hits, stay with it instead of planning your next escape. Sit in silence, read deeply, or dive into one single topic or relationship rather than skimming the surface of many.
• Remember a time when you were sad and someone comforted you.
• Think of making a commitment and be OK with it.
• You are bored doing this exercise but stay with it till your anxiety decreases.

Type 8: The Powerful Person (Integrates to 2)

• The Step: Lower your guard and lead with vulnerability.
• How to do it: Intentionally put down your armor. Show your softer, gentler side to people you trust. Instead of automatically taking charge or bulldozing ahead, use your power to protect, nurture, and empower others.
• Each day see one thing or person new and fresh and unjaded with the eyes of a new-born child.
• Remember a time when you were told what to do and stay with it till the anger and anxiety diminish.
• Think of a time when you felt vulnerable and stay with it till your anxiety diminishes.

Type 9: The Peaceful Person (Integrates to 3)

• The Step: Wake up to your own life and take decisive action.
• How to do it: Uncover your hidden desires and declare them out loud. Stop merging with other people’s plans. Set clear, personal goals, believe that your presence matters to the world, and take active, energetic steps toward what you want.
• Each day do something you are putting off.
• Remember a time you were in an argument and stay with it till the anxiety decreases.
• Think of a time you stood out and asked for what you wanted and stay with it till your anxiety decreases.

I have to admit, I laughed almost out loud (I still don’t want to look that foolish) when the werewolf teens talked about “wolfing out.” Actually, maybe laughing when I “Five out” might diminish the embarrassment and fear after I do so. I’m also reminded that being able to laugh at oneself is a sign of mental health. Or at least that’s what the inmates say.

So, the next time you “Enneatype out,” don’t take it so seriously. Don’t feed the wolf, play with it. Your wolf has helped you to survive, now domesticate it into a less fierce resourceful companion.

Practice these 3 R’s:

• Recognize: Notice the physical body tension or loop of thoughts unique to your trigger.
• Reflect: Ask yourself, “What threat am I trying to protect myself from right now?”
• Release: Take a deep breath and intentionally choose the integration behavior listed above.